Transcript
[00:00:00.00] So, let me tell you about some of my friends.
[00:00:05.48] What’s the big deal?
[00:00:07.92] I got his friend named Bill.
[00:00:10.32] He’s so bored all the time.
[00:00:12.36] He’s always trying to tell me stuff up in the sky.
[00:00:16.12] The other friend named Frank, his last name is incense.
[00:00:22.40] Let me tell you, Murrabadrin.
[00:00:24.40] Frank’s like, Frank’s like, he sleeps in a hot dog bun.
[00:00:30.20] Fool.
[00:00:31.20] Now, what are you doing?
[00:00:33.04] I got a bun, stupid.
[00:00:34.96] Hey, he likes it.
[00:00:36.32] He works at a ballpark.
[00:00:37.56] Frank also was a big deal.
[00:00:40.44] His sister, I have never met a brat like her.
[00:00:44.00] She is totally the worst.
[00:00:45.80] This guy Frank, he has a dog, it’s a docks and boot.
[00:00:48.76] Someone’s like, you do yoga.
[00:00:50.24] What do you think?
[00:00:51.32] What do you think if I do yoga and I go?
[00:00:53.96] Look at this whale noise and stuff.
[00:00:56.92] The arm feels better.
[00:00:58.44] So anyways, I’m talking to these amphibians.
[00:01:01.52] I’m like, why can’t you come up with anything new?
[00:01:05.16] He says pigs over here.
[00:01:07.52] But he’s not boring me like you are.
[00:01:09.24] He’s not being, you know, he’s over here
[00:01:12.20] in this trash or what’s that about?
[00:01:16.56] So someone was like, why do you feel so bad about him?
[00:01:19.60] Fibian.
[00:01:20.44] I’m so angry about him.
[00:01:21.92] You know, I’m like, I’m not.
[00:01:25.16] I talk to him.
[00:01:26.28] I just keep getting salad matter and notter.
[00:01:28.64] I am in water.
[00:01:30.76] Because I’m like, why can’t you make up your mind?
[00:01:33.08] This just remind me of my friend.
[00:01:35.28] His name is Gil.
[00:01:36.08] He’s fish.
[00:01:37.84] Someone was like, what do you think about a strike two?
[00:01:40.64] This game will look.
[00:01:42.32] Who do you think you are?
[00:01:43.64] You’re all trying to be a standout stuff?
[00:01:46.36] You know, I’m clonching lines.
[00:01:49.64] You’re down there drawing circles on napkins or whatever.
[00:01:52.52] You’re like drawing your circles.
[00:01:53.80] Who’s that square up there?
[00:01:55.12] He’s all about equality and stuff.
[00:01:57.04] Who’s that about?
[00:01:58.20] What’s that about?
[00:01:59.88] Um, maybe one.
[00:02:02.16] So it was like, what do you think about posterboard?
[00:02:03.80] What do you think?
[00:02:06.56] Look at my shirt, look at that.
[00:02:08.28] That’s so much.
[00:02:09.64] Surf, armpit.
[00:02:12.04] Because cardboard just gets soggy.
[00:02:14.16] You know, you’re right on a surfboard.
[00:02:16.04] You’re like, hey, what?
[00:02:18.72] I turn my porch light on.
[00:02:19.92] I turn it off.
[00:02:21.20] What’s the big deal?
[00:02:23.00] Everyone’s like, why are you turning your porch light on?
[00:02:26.96] I’m trying to sleep.
[00:02:28.76] What’s that about?
[00:02:30.44] Maybe one.
[00:02:31.92] Whatever.
[00:02:34.44] Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
[00:02:39.04] I have this fountain in my house.
[00:02:40.52] It’s purple.
[00:02:41.52] What’s that about?
[00:02:43.72] It’s filled out with water.
[00:02:45.28] It has a little some mist inside the cone out of it.
[00:02:48.08] What’s that about?
[00:02:49.92] Would you give it a bit of a stupid?
[00:02:52.84] Hey, you like 70% of my body?
[00:02:56.80] Because you like water.
[00:02:58.32] Because I’m always carrying water.
[00:03:00.48] I like water when I do yoga.
[00:03:02.00] Someone was like, you like doing yoga?
[00:03:03.80] What do you think about it now?
[00:03:05.40] Huh? Huh? Huh?
[00:03:06.72] Someone’s like, whoop.
[00:03:16.32] Yeah, I know.
[00:03:17.36] I don’t know what to do.
[00:03:18.56] So if you’re like, have you ever been to New France, Kafka?
[00:03:21.08] I’m like, whoop.
[00:03:24.88] I’m punching lines.
[00:03:28.64] I don’t know if you’re talking about.
[00:03:29.64] I’m almost like, are you an artist?
[00:03:31.88] Are you an artist?
[00:03:38.92] I was like, yeah.
[00:03:40.32] Whoop.
[00:03:41.32] Whoop.
[00:03:43.16] We think stupid.
[00:03:46.00] Look at my hair, dude.
[00:03:47.32] No, she’s nice.
[00:03:49.36] I like ladies.
[00:03:50.28] This one lady asked me about stuff.
[00:03:52.84] She was like, we think about wearing your helmet
[00:03:57.20] when you’re biking.
[00:03:58.68] This is a good idea.
[00:04:00.08] What am I gonna do?
[00:04:01.00] What am I gonna do?
[00:04:01.84] And cardboard.
[00:04:03.92] Is this cardboard for it?
[00:04:05.12] I made girls last, whatever.
[00:04:10.32] Yo, here.
[00:04:11.08] Who’s this square?
[00:04:12.08] I’ll do my stand up routine.
[00:04:15.28] This guy throws a mango at me.
[00:04:18.16] Thanks, dude.
[00:04:19.52] I’m learning fruit salad.
[00:04:20.64] So yogurt, granola, fruit, and a bowl.
[00:04:23.52] I gave it to my friend with colors,
[00:04:27.08] and it’s yogurt, fruit, granola, put it in a bowl.
[00:04:31.32] I gave it to her.
[00:04:32.16] She’s hungry.
[00:04:33.04] You know, it looks like she was enjoying it.
[00:04:34.80] I was like, what do you think about that?
[00:04:35.80] Is that up to parfait?
[00:04:37.68] I’m punching lines.
[00:04:39.12] I gave it to her.
[00:04:39.96] She’s hungry.
[00:04:42.16] You know, enough for you, Elsa?
[00:04:44.52] I was on the bus.
[00:04:48.68] This guy, no hair.
[00:04:51.24] And it was okay.
[00:04:52.56] It’s like, it’s like, showers.
[00:04:57.56] Like they just happened.
[00:04:59.24] This guy didn’t have hair.
[00:05:02.80] Look, you look like I don’t want me.
[00:05:05.84] I was like, look at my name.
[00:05:08.64] Look at each other.
[00:05:11.36] After that.
[00:05:13.20] Woo.
[00:05:16.20] And everything that I had ever thought was right was wrong.
[00:05:22.20] I was like, where’s your gun?
[00:05:24.20] Can you give it to me because I’m shooting?
[00:05:26.20] Shoot for the stars.
[00:05:28.20] Okay.
[00:05:29.20] Elevator operator is like,
[00:05:31.20] okay.
[00:05:33.20] That’s what he was saying.
[00:05:35.20] His name was Alfredo.
[00:05:36.20] I was wondering if he got any jokes from pasta lovers.
[00:05:41.20] What’s he gonna do?
[00:05:42.20] What’s he gonna do?
[00:05:43.20] Like, I’m sorry.
[00:05:45.20] I’m sorry.
[00:05:47.20] You know, if you’re drawing your circles,
[00:05:48.20] you’re like, who’s this square?
[00:05:49.20] I’ll go on a quality and stuff.
[00:05:51.20] Just abide in it a little bit.
[00:05:54.20] Do you have any something to do?
[00:05:57.20] I don’t know if you’re talking about it.
Archive: _Documentation/Videos/2009/CRFW_TUDALOOS_2008-2009_Video Rips/CRFW_2009_someone was like 2 (stand up demo 4 reel).mov